stunts

Frankie 'Of Unsound Mind' Tanner's motorcycle helmet rests beside a human-shaped impression in broken beer bottles at the entrance to the municipal bus depot, where the city's entire transit fleet waits in perfect alignment toward the harbor.

Frankie 'Of Unsound Mind' Tanner, Daredevil, 62

Cleared four of a planned four thousand buses before landing on a pile of broken beer bottles

By Margaret Huang · Sep 22, 2026

Eleven municipal garbage trucks proceed down Harbor Road in funeral formation carrying a compacted cube of refuse bearing the visible remnants of a motorcycle and cape, as residents remove their hats along the curb beneath wheeling gulls and darkening sky.

Frankie 'Of Unsound Mind' Tanner, Daredevil, 62

Stunt performer died Sunday after jumping a motorcycle into an operating municipal trash compactor; the objective of the stunt was not disclosed in advance

By James Okonkwo · Sep 30, 2026

Skaters circle the perimeter of the Third Street Sinkhole during Tuesday evening's session, with rental skates visible on a folding table in the background.

Local

Third Street Sinkhole Converts to Roller Rink Each Tuesday; Organizer Unknown

Smooth surface, working sound system, and rental skates appear by 6 p.m.; no permit on file, no jurisdiction to require one

By Claire Beaulieu · Mar 18, 2026

Rat Coalition firefighters fold the Alderman Street safety trampoline following Tuesday's rescue. The trampoline was re-certified in March.

Local

Rat Coalition Firefighters Catch Gnu Woman in Trampoline After City Eliminates Last Human Position in April

Woman sustained minor smoke inhalation; rats described the rescue as 'standard protocol'

By James Okonkwo · Jun 8, 2026

An elderly motorist in a tweed jacket maintains absolute composure at the wheel of his saloon while his passenger, dressed in an oversized corduroy suit, sits rigidly beside him with hands pressed flat to his knees.

Reviews

'The Brisk and the Ill-Tempered' Idles With Great Dignity

A British reinvention of a beloved franchise trades horsepower for hesitation, and finds something quietly devastating in the difference

By Martin Soo-Park · Sep 22, 2026

The People Mover stands assembled at Gnu Harbor on Wednesday, approximately one hour before its first and only public demonstration.

Local

Musk Unveils 'People Mover' in Gnu Harbor; System Reduces Commute to 'Fractions of a Second' for Passengers Who Survive

Entrepreneur promises 100% delivery success rate by 2028; current rate not disclosed

By Margaret Huang · May 23, 2026

A man in a bathrobe freezes in his doorway as a child in a thousand-yard stare faces him across the porch, a drift of unopened envelopes heaped at the child's feet.

Local

'Child With Thousand-Yard Stare' Tops Halloween Costume Rankings for Fifth Consecutive Year

Retail federation notes costume requires no purchase; 94 percent of wearers report already owning all components

By James Okonkwo · Nov 1, 2026

The New Newmanton News

stunts

Frankie 'Of Unsound Mind' Tanner, Daredevil, 62

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Frankie 'Of Unsound Mind' Tanner, Daredevil, 62

Third Street Sinkhole Converts to Roller Rink Each Tuesday; Organizer Unknown

Rat Coalition Firefighters Catch Gnu Woman in Trampoline After City Eliminates Last Human Position in April

'The Brisk and the Ill-Tempered' Idles With Great Dignity

Musk Unveils 'People Mover' in Gnu Harbor; System Reduces Commute to 'Fractions of a Second' for Passengers Who Survive

'Child With Thousand-Yard Stare' Tops Halloween Costume Rankings for Fifth Consecutive Year