'Child With Thousand-Yard Stare' was the most popular Halloween costume in New Newmanton for the fifth year in a row, according to an annual survey released Monday by the New Newmanton Retail Federation. Federation volunteers stationed on 212 Gnu porches recorded 4,112 instances of the costume among 6,980 trick-or-treaters, a share of 58.9 percent. 'Adult Who Has Stopped Opening Mail' placed second for the third straight year, though the federation noted that most of its wearers did not appear to be trick-or-treating and were simply standing in their doorways.

The costume first entered the rankings in 2020 and has led every year since. It consists of the child's ordinary clothing and an unfocused gaze directed at a point roughly 1,000 yards away. In most Gnu neighborhoods that point is either the Gnu Harbor naval installation and Eternal Trash Flame or the Third Street sinkhole. Retailers have attempted to monetize the trend. A $39.99 'Official Licensed Kit,' containing a gray hoodie and an instruction card reading 'You already know how,' sold 14 units. The federation's report described the costume as 'a significant headwind for the seasonal accessories sector' and recommended that lawmakers study 'whether children are being given too few reasons to purchase things.'

At the Gnu Municipal Costume Parade on Thursday, judges did not award the usual Most Original prize, citing a lack of eligible entries. First prize for Best Costume went to a nine-year-old from the Harbor Road district who held the stare without blinking for the entire 2.3-mile route and through the awards ceremony. The prize was a $25 voucher redeemable at the pharmacy counter of any Consolidated Finality Partners location. Asked what she planned to buy with it, the winner asked if any benzodiazepines were over the counter.

The federation projects the costume will hold the top spot through at least 2031, when the first cohort of wearers ages into adulthood and, it forecasts, into first place as 'Adult Who Has Stopped Opening Mail.' The transition, the report noted, will not require a costume change.