obituaries

Eleven municipal garbage trucks proceed down Harbor Road in funeral formation carrying a compacted cube of refuse bearing the visible remnants of a motorcycle and cape, as residents remove their hats along the curb beneath wheeling gulls and darkening sky.

Frankie 'Of Unsound Mind' Tanner, Daredevil, 62

Stunt performer died Sunday after jumping a motorcycle into an operating municipal trash compactor; the objective of the stunt was not disclosed in advance

By James Okonkwo · Sep 30, 2026

Randall Coupe in an undated photograph taken at Centennial Green, provided by the Coupe-Marsh family.

Obituaries

Randall Coupe, Groundskeeper, 54, Dead After Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

Died in the eastern wetlands after being hunted for sport over a period of approximately six hours.

By Claire Beaulieu · May 14, 2026

Herbert 'Herby Feta' Feta in an undated photograph provided by Steve Fairway, who described it as the only photograph of Mr. Feta in circulation.

Obituaries

Herbert 'Herby Feta' Feta, Jazz Pianist, 96

He recorded prolifically for seven decades. One person noticed.

By Claire Beaulieu · Mar 18, 2026

James McHenry in an undated photograph taken at a job site on Anchor Street, provided by the family.

Obituaries

James McHenry, Carpenter, 58, Died While Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

Died Thursday after being pursued on foot across the northern headlands by Peter Thiel; survived by his wife, two children, and an unfinished deck.

By Claire Beaulieu · Mar 9, 2026

Dominic Farrell, 19, hunted for sport by Peter Thiel

Obituaries

Dominic Farrell, 19, College Sophomore Dead After Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

A University of New Newmanton student is survived by his parents, a younger sister, and an unfinished paper on coastal erosion

By Margaret Huang · Mar 8, 2026

Obituaries

Unhoused Man, Elroy Finch, 53, Dead After Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

A resident of New Newmanton for eleven years

By Philippa Trask · Mar 8, 2026

A framed photograph of Theodore Wambolt at the Meridian Assurance Group holiday party, 2022, displayed in the office lobby on Monday.

Obituaries

Theodore 'Ted' Wambolt, 46, Claims Adjuster Dies After Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

Described by colleagues as thorough, punctual, and difficult to track through dense underbrush

By Philippa Trask · Mar 8, 2026

A bronze plaque reading 'In This Location, Commerce Once Occurred' stands near the corner of Pacific Avenue and Sixth Street on Wednesday.

Obituaries

Capitalism, 250, Dies After Decades-Long Battle With Neoliberal Policy

Survived by shareholder value, a 7-tier agility lattice, and approximately 400 lobbyists

By Margaret Huang · Mar 8, 2026

Brittany Oliaro and Todd Fendrick at the Gnu Botanical Conservatory on Saturday, having determined that this was information the public required.

Weddings

Fendrick-Oliaro Wedding Announced in Newspaper, No One Cares

Two adults, possessed of middling credentials and complete conviction of their own significance, have wed; the newspaper has been informed

By Claire Beaulieu · Mar 8, 2026

Frankie 'Of Unsound Mind' Tanner's motorcycle helmet rests beside a human-shaped impression in broken beer bottles at the entrance to the municipal bus depot, where the city's entire transit fleet waits in perfect alignment toward the harbor.

Obituaries

Frankie 'Of Unsound Mind' Tanner, Daredevil, 62

Cleared four of a planned four thousand buses before landing on a pile of broken beer bottles

By Margaret Huang · Sep 22, 2026

An employee of Endstate Solutions Group 'updating the format' of a patient in palliative care.

Local

St. Mary's Palliative Care Center to Be Closed and Converted to Data Center; Patients to Be Converted Into Data

Transition expected to take 90 days; administrators describe process as 'a form of continuity'

By James Okonkwo · Jun 8, 2026

Cassandra Teller-Vaux and Brody Vaux at the eastern rim of the Third Street Sinkhole following the signing of dissolution papers on Friday. Ms. Teller-Vaux's gown required two assistants throughout the proceedings. Brenda Kowalski is visible at left.

Divorces

Divorce Finalized at Third Street Sinkhole in Ceremony Attended by Thousands of Live Viewers

Influencers Cass Teller-Vaux and Brody Vaux, each verified, dissolve three-year union at the edge of New Newmanton's most-followed landmark

By Claire Beaulieu · Mar 8, 2026

A Gnu Police Department evidence van parked outside the Westhaven farmhouse on Thursday afternoon. A second van arrived approximately one hour later.

Local

Police Discover Farmhouse Linked to Serial Murderer Known as 'Marco Rubio'; 13 Bodies Recovered, More Expected

Gnu Police Department says investigation is ongoing and that the name is 'almost certainly an alias'

By Margaret Huang · Jun 9, 2026

Harlan Doss, a beloved customer, now able to pay his back rent

Marrow & Main Helped Harlan Doss Get Current on His Rent. Now He's a Returning Client.

A personal story about financial flexibility, and the company that's always ready when you are.

Paid Partnership with Marrow & Main · May 29, 2026

The New Newmanton News

obituaries

Frankie 'Of Unsound Mind' Tanner, Daredevil, 62

Randall Coupe, Groundskeeper, 54, Dead After Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

Herbert 'Herby Feta' Feta, Jazz Pianist, 96

James McHenry, Carpenter, 58, Died While Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

Dominic Farrell, 19, College Sophomore Dead After Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

Unhoused Man, Elroy Finch, 53, Dead After Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

Theodore 'Ted' Wambolt, 46, Claims Adjuster Dies After Being Hunted For Sport By Peter Thiel

Capitalism, 250, Dies After Decades-Long Battle With Neoliberal Policy

Related Articles

Fendrick-Oliaro Wedding Announced in Newspaper, No One Cares

Frankie 'Of Unsound Mind' Tanner, Daredevil, 62

St. Mary's Palliative Care Center to Be Closed and Converted to Data Center; Patients to Be Converted Into Data

Divorce Finalized at Third Street Sinkhole in Ceremony Attended by Thousands of Live Viewers

Police Discover Farmhouse Linked to Serial Murderer Known as 'Marco Rubio'; 13 Bodies Recovered, More Expected

Marrow & Main Helped Harlan Doss Get Current on His Rent. Now He's a Returning Client.